Saturday, April 7, 2007

I had been Arested

Sorry for my absence.
For one thing, the British navy crew arrested by Eye-ranians were not 15 but 16 and I happen to be the 16th. And how I wasn’t counted is an intelligence sophisticated technique I couldn’t just give it away. So I had to share a seat with one of them on the plane back to Britain.
We were just having a good time sailing when they arrested us. We were certainly not on Eye-ranian waters. I kept checking our position with the map I had. On my map there was a line showing the border and I never saw the line while sailing. I even used an underwater viewer to see if the line was down there. If we had crossed the line we would have seen it. And being arrested on Eye-raqi waters shows that it was them Eye-ranians who were on Eye-raqi waters. So I kept telling our British friends to arrest them. And if they had listened to me the story was now the other way round with more than thirty Eye-ranians captive.
But it was all good luck for us because of the Eye-ranian New Year holidays. We were given fish and rice and some other Eye-ranian food. I had no problem with the food and nor did my British friends since in Britain you can hardly find an English restaurant these days.
Apart from appearing in a few video clips we did nothing but sit and eat pistachios and dried seeds while watching Eye-ranian TV showing American action films. Imagine Kevin Costner talking in Farsi. I had to keep quiet all the time not to give away my American accent which is so similar to that of Bush’s. And strained my self not to laugh at the jokes made by our Eye-ranian captors.
Of course I am trying to get over the shock of Eye-ranians psychological tortures. Seeing all those men with guns in their hands was so shocking especially for my marine friends who were not used to that sort of things In Iraq they are writing their diaries and playing computer games.
In London we were arrested again for sometime!
While in London I had a complete English breakfast, visit Tower of London, Hampton Court Palace, Holborn and a few other places. I am going to catch a train from Victoria to Brighton along the coast to Eastborn and contact our man there to arrange my return to Tehran. Not to mention good old Fish n’ Chips in paper with lots of salt and vinegar and pickled eggs AND Pouring a pint dahn me Gregory. I aint much of a fanny magnet or tyre kicker so that’s that.
See you in Tehran. Bye for now.

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